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You had no idea you did it and it's not that I'm actually angry at you, but rather a bit puzzled as to how someone could step in a pile of dog shit that considerable, IN STRAPPY HEELS, NOT NOTICE, and then as you continue to do your heel-toe chicken strut manage to fling a small portion of said shit directly into my shin.

This happened on the west side of Sunny Brook Lane near Grand Ave. I saw it in your face that you had no recognition of what you were doing, for that I shall spare you any rage-filled verbal lynching, but by now you must have figured it out, cleaned it off, and are probably neck-deep in the toilet vomiting up the last of your banana nut muffin b/c I SAW some of it on your open toe, which no doubt you have by now as well.

So, shit-kicker, I do not blame you for your actions, for I am a Buddhist and realize the futility of such an action, but I do pose a question; karmically speaking, you stepped in that dog shit for a reason, probably a wrong-doing of some kind in a past life or in this one. I ask you what you think you might have done to cause this event to transpire, and, how did I get involved. As the Buddha taught 2500 years ago, we all keep coming back, over and over again, starting off where we left off from the previous life. So as I'm reflecting on this right now, I realize the error in my ways. Perhaps it is I who owes the apology, seeing as how some sort of horrible transgression on my part towards you was finally paid up today when you sent that Hershey kiss of dog excrement hurtling towards my Banana Republic pants.

Everything is random, yet nothing is. So I digress my shit-kicking girl...I say we're even. And for what it's worth, I'm sorry about that little incident 239 years ago. I never intended to have my horse kick you in the mouth like that.

Ok, that's a lie, I kinda intended, but didn't think it would cause such extensive damage. The practice of Dentistry wasn't then what it is today.